The Amazing SpiderSponge
by Jodan007
Summary: After being bitten by a radioactive spider, SpongeBob gets superpowers and fights crime. However, there is something big going on and SpiderSponge is the only one who can stop it.
1. Spider Bite

I got this idea one night before I went to sleep. This is a SpongeBob fanfic that parodies the movie 'Spiderman'. Unlike my other ideas for parodies and spoofs, this one doesn't copy the movie almost word for word. This is my own work of art.

Disclaimer: I do not own SpongeBob SquarePants. If I did, I would be stinking rich.

On with the show.

oxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

The Amazing SpiderSponge 

It was a beautiful day in Bikini Bottom. Sunshine, clear water, and JELLYFISHING!

Yes, it was the day of the Annual Jellyfishing Convention in Midland Bottom. (Just some place that took me a while to make up) Basically a bus is scheduled every year for said event. Fortunately, there were quite a bit of fans of jellyfishing, so the bus was usually almost filled up entirely. It is here on this bus that we see two creatures in particular. One of them is a pink starfish by the name of Patrick Star (I'm not sure if that is his real last name, but I like it). The other is a squirrel by the name of Sandy Cheeks. However, there are usually three of them. This third member of the group has always been abused in many ways. In fact, I wouldn't be surprised if he was right outside the bus right now, yelling at the driver to stop.

"Hey, I am right outside the bus right now, yelling at the driver to stop."

Yes, it was the young porous creature known by most creatures as Mr. No Brains.

However, we will just call him SpongeBob SquarePants. Anyway, he has been treated pretty darn badly for most of his life. However, unbeknownst to him, his life was going to change drastically in a matter of hours. But that is a story for later. Because a certain squirrel happens to be really pissed at the driver for refusing to stop for the little sponge.

"Hey, c'mon already. I'm getting tired out here," yelled out the tired sponge.

"Listen to him. He's been chasin' us ever since we left," shouted Sandy, who just happened to be so angry that she was standing up (Doing this also happened to earn her a few "Oooooooooohhhh's". God, I hate that). Luckily, the driver had gotten bored of teasing SpongeBob and opened the bus doors. After SpongeBob got on however, he was still used to running and just ended up tripping over his own feet and falling flat on his face, earning him a lot of laughs from everyone on the bus except his two best friends.

"Oh well," he said slowly, "At least I'll be able to enjoy the convention."

After that, he joined his friends for the rest of the trip, which took about ten minutes to get to the convention.

2 hours later…

The convention has just ended and our trio is just leaving.

"Ah, that was one of the best jellyfishing conventions that was ever held."

"Uh, Sponge, you done said that fer the fifth year in a row."

"So? Each convention is that good."

"…Anyone want ice cream?"

(I don't need to tell you who said that one. Do I?)

Anyway, in the midst of Sandy and SpongeBob's growing argument, no one (Especially Patrick, who wasn't paying attention to anything except his ice cream) had noticed something small crawling into the back of SpongeBob's pants.

"I've always noticed that you're not excited about these events as me and Patrick!"

"Hey, I like these types of events!"

"Well, not as much as us. And can you get your hand out of my pants?"

"My hand isn't in your pants," Sandy said in a calmer tone.

Now SpongeBob was a little scared.

"Patrick?"

However, turning around, Sponge noticed that Patrick happened to be holding an ice cream cone in his right hand and a paper bag with a carton of ice cream in the other, not leaving any way to put his hand in anyone's pants. He wasn't even looking at them.

By now, SpongeBob was as scared as he could ever be.

"Okay. Then who-AAAUUUGH!"

Let's just say that he was cut off when he felt a horrible pain in his butt. About a second later, the perpetrator of this confusion had finally crawled out of SpongeBob's pants. Scurrying across the sand was a small spider (Don't ask me how a spider managed to get, let alone survive, underwater). However, unlike any normal spider, this one was glowing with an orange aura. About five seconds later, it died.

"What is it?" Sponge finally asked, turning around.

"Nothin' to worry about. It was just a spider. Wait, why is it glowing like that?"

"I don't know."

"Don't worry about it, Sponge, it was just a spider bite."

"I don't know. I feel kinda funny. Oh man, it feels like I'm gonna throw up."

Indeed SpongeBob felt worse than he had ever felt in his entire life. His head was throbbing so much that it felt like his head would explode. He felt like throwing up everything in that was his body at once. His blood also seemed to be heating up at an alarming rate.

"Sandy, I need to get home. Now."

"Alright SpongeBob."

With those words, they started making their way to the bus.

"Hey, SpongeBob. There's a dead, glowing spider here."

Yes, Patrick wasn't paying attention to anything that was going on until now.

About 10 minutes later…

They had managed to make it all the way to SpongeBob's house. SpongeBob was lying down on his couch, still suffering. Sandy was sitting by his side, ready for anything he may need. However, she was beating herself up over the guilt of all of this. She had also sent Patrick out to get some supplies (Probably because she was tired of him spilling ice cream all over the floor).

"If SpongeBob dies, I'll never forgive myself."

"No Sandy, It's not your fault."

With those words, SpongeBob passed out from the exhaustion of his immense pain.

oxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

By the way, I should mention that this is my first real fanfic. In case you didn't notice, I like the nickname 'Sponge'. I also find it a little hard to write lines for Sandy. (It's the way she talks). Those last few lines also sounded a bit corny and cliche to me. But what can I say, I did my best on this. Please tell me if I did good or not.


	2. Insanity

Sorry it took so long to post an update, but I admit that I'm lazy. However, I have a feeling that this chapter will start up something in the story.

Disclaimer: I do not own SpongeBob Squarepants (and I doubt I ever will).

By the way, starting with this chapter, I will be writing my fics on my new laptop.

oxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

It was a dark and stormy night (which is kind of weird, considering that it was a beautiful day earlier). It would appear that nobody would even think about doing anything on a dreary day like this.

However, there is still one light on in one building. This building in particular was known as the Chum Bucket. Its appearance alone would be enough to make anyone run in fear (and it has. Honestly, how could anybody leave the place messy like this)?

"Don't rub it in."

(Huh?)

"Down here."

(Huh?)

"OH, COME ON! IT'S PLANKTON! I'M THE OWNER OF THE PLACE THAT YOU JUST CALLED SCARY! IF YOU DON'T PLAY YOUR CARDS RIGHT, THEN I WILL MAKE SURE THAT YOU ARE SHAVED BALD AND PUT INTO AN ACID BATH!"

(…Huh?)

"Oh, forget it. Just go on, my throat hurts."

(Alllrighty then!)

(Sorry, I couldn't resist. Gotta love those "Ace Ventura" movies.)

The figure that is now standing before you is a creature known as Plankton. Like a "certain someone", he is not loved, he is pure evil (though his bark is worse than his bite), and to be perfectly honest, …he smells weird.

"I believe I already established not to rub anything in."

(Tell you what, Half-Pint. If you're so damn smart, then why don't you go and invent soap.)

"Just go on."

Anyway, Plankton had just finished getting groceries (although he was also getting machine parts…and a pint of whiskey). Although it probably isn't the best place to put it, the Chum Bucket Lab was directly in the back of the restaurant. It was here that Plankton had put to work various schemes to abduct the Krabby Patty Secret Formula. These so-called schemes were organized into Plans A-Z. However, something new was being put to work. Recently, Plankton had cooked up a new, more modern plan, Plan Z3. So let's meet the only other one awake at this hour. One who didn't fall asleep because she couldn't fall asleep. She is Plankton's computer wife, Karen.

"**So, how did it go, Sheldon?"**

"It was going alright until SOMEBODY started making fun of me and my restaurant!"

(Fine, I won't talk to anybody in this story anymore.)

"Alright…Anyway, I think I got everything."

"**I'll say you did."**

"What are you implying?"

"**I sensed liquor on your breath. You were out drinking again, weren't you?"**

"Welllll…Alright, I might have had one or two Bikini Bottom Typhoons on my way back."

"**More like about ten or twenty!"**

"Oh, shut up, Karen. Let's get this underway."

Walking up to a table, he dumped the out the contents of the paper sack. Amongst all the food, various magazines like "Evil Maniac Monthly" and "How to learn from many past mistakes", and the whiskey; there were numerous machine pieces. Not a lot, but enough for a small tune-up on something. Immediately, Plankton set to work finishing up the preparations for Plan Z3.

"Let's just hope this one works. I don't want this to end up like Plan Z2."

"I remember that one. You pretended to be an efficiency expert. Then, you sent me into the Krusty Krab to pose as an efficiency robot to secretly witness how a Krabby Patty is made."

"Yeah, it was working splendidly until that sponge caught you."

"Well, what can I say? He was at least doing his job."

"So? Who would have thought that a good plan could be ruined by that freakin' loser?"

"**Well, don't you learn from your mistakes?"**

"Hmmmm…Nope. Can't say that I do. All right. I'm finished."

Pulling back a large sheet (that must've been pretty difficult), Plankton revealed a six-foot tall robot. Unlike the Krabs robot that he had built before, this one was built with enough power to blow up an entire building in one blow. It was white with red flame-like marks spray painted on it. It appeared to be tougher than nails. It looked like a tank on legs. Each arm was equipped with a single rocket launcher, a Gatling gun, and a laser cutter. The shoulder areas housed missile launchers. The main torso area had a turbine engine, along with a rocket booster. When these were combined with the smaller boosters on the ankles, the robot itself would be capable of achieving flight. There was even a storage area around the waist for holding plasma grenades (who did he have to kill to get those?). Finally, the head had a single yellow eye, which looked very similar to Plankton's. Behind the eye was a cockpit small enough to house someone about an inch tall.

"I've tried everything to get that Secret Formula. I've even tried humiliating myself by dancing in a tutu. The only thing I haven't tried is force. Karen, get me that strength enhancing formula I've been working on. Did the tests come out positive?"

"Every single one. I administered it to plant subjects. They all grew bigger and stronger at an incredible rate. What do you need it for anyway?"

"If the robot doesn't work, I'll at least have incredible strength to get myself through without getting stepped on."

"As excited as I am, Sheldon, I fear that one of the ingredients used in this formula could have a side effect on you."

"Like what? My liver will turn green and my toenails will fall off?"

"No, worse. Insanity."

"Who cares?"

Obviously, the effects of the alcohol were starting to take place. Luckily, Karen knew this.

"**Could you at least cut down on your drinking?"**

"Yeah, I'll do that when I'm dead. Inject me now!"

After hesitating, Karen finally injected the clear, green substance into Plankton's bloodstream. Plankton didn't really show any signs of a change. Aside from some minor shivering, he was okay. Plankton decided to test if it worked on him. He walked over to a brick that was lying on the floor. Normally, it would have taken all of his might to lift it. However, he tried picking it up and it felt as light as a feather. Just then, a freakishly huge grin started growing on Plankton's face. Every last bit of sanity was immediately lost from his mind. Karen was quickly trying to calm him down, but her efforts were in vain.

"You know, Karen, you probably should have known better than to mess with me when I was drunk."

"**What do you mean?"**

"Well, let's just say the honeymoon's over."

With those words, he threw the brick directly at Karen, destroying her instantly. All that was left was a useless keyboard, a smashed monitor, and messed up parts. The only ones left in the lab were Plankton, his robot, and insanity.

Evil had been unleashed into Bikini Bottom.

oxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

By the way, Plan Z2 was not entirely mine. I read it in a SpongeBob magazine. I just renamed it.

Well, I hope you like it. I worked for a long time on this one.

Please Review.


	3. Amazing Changes Part 1

Yep. The Toshiba laptop is running just fine. I made a new folder just for my fanfics, so it should be easier to find my files.

**Disclaimer: **I do not own SpongeBob and I never will.

oxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

SpongeBob was currently where we last left him. Sleeping on his couch. He had gotten a serious bite from an orange glowing spider just the day before. Slowly, he woke up.

"(Yawn) Well, that was a good sleep that I just had…Wait a minute. That was a good sleep that I just had."

Amazingly, Sponge had been feeling terrible ever since the spider bite. He practically had to let his suffering put him to sleep. Today, however, he was feeling particularly…perfect.

"Alright…I think I'll just get a soda."

So he walked into his kitchen and went to the refrigerator. After opening it, he grabbed a soda and started chugging it down quickly. He didn't even notice that when he opened the refrigerator, he ripped the door right off its hinges. At least he didn't notice until about five seconds after putting it back on.

"… Wait, did I just do that."

After inspecting the refrigerator from top to bottom, he came upon one conclusion.

"Cheap fridge" he decided.

* * *

He went back to the living room. The only other person besides Gary and himself was Sandy, who was sleeping in an armchair. He decided to have…a little fun. 

"OH, MY GOD! I'M DYING!"

That worked. Actually, it sent Sandy literally through the roof. When she came back down three minutes later, she showed SpongeBob that she could do a very good imitation of an underwater volcano. (It was a miracle her helmet didn't explode)

* * *

**Two Minutes of Ear Splitting Profanity Later…**

"Alright, SpongeBob. I think I'm okay." Sandy said after cooling down a bit.

"That's good, Sandy." SpongeBob replied while stuffing cotton balls into the holes in the sides of his head.

"Well, I thought of a way for you to pay me back for scaring me like that."

"Oka-What is it?"

"I reserved a copy of "Enchantment Under the Sea" over at the video store. All you have to do is go pick it up."

"Oh…that's a relief. I thought you were gonna send me on some mission to the moon to kill a giant moon monster, or something."

"No. Now it's already been paid for. Just pick it up and mention a reservation under the name "Sandy". I'd do it myself, but you should be able to do it quicker than a jackrabbit on a bed of hot chicken grease."

"_Man, I hate those metaphors._" SpongeBob thought to himself. "Alright. I'll do it," he concluded.

* * *

SpongeBob was walking down the street to the main area of Bikini Bottom. However, as a guy with no license in a big city, he got pretty tired of walking pretty quickly. 

"You know, I've been walking everywhere for quite a while," he said, "I think I'll call a bus."

Sponge saw a bus and walked over with his hand out. Little did he know that this was the same exact bus from yesterday, so (you guessed it) it drove right past him.

SpongeBob would have just forgotten about it, but today was different. Today he would do something about it. He started running after the bus, which would most likely have its license provoked for speeding over 87 mph. After about 14 seconds, he was right up against the right side of the bus. At first, everyone in the bus, who were just laughing and taunting earlier were shocked that this little yellow guy was able to keep up with the bus' speed.

Unfortunately, they started right back up again when they realized that SpongeBob was only able to keep up with the sidewall of the bus.

Well, SpongeBob wasn't going to take it anymore.

"At least I can do this," he said, slamming his left hand against the side of the bus.

Strangely enough, his hand stuck to the bus. This caught him by surprise and pulled him right off his feet, resulting in SpongeBob becoming a living windsock attached to the side of the bus.

After being attached to the side of the speeding bus for about ten seconds, SpongeBob thought about what life would be like stuck there forever. As if on cue, Sponge's hand was forced free when he was hit on the head with a streetlight. (Now when you hit something with your head at a speed like that, you can bet that it is going to hurt.)

Stranger still, however, when he put his hand to his head a second later, he felt perfectly fine.

"Well, that was weird," Spongebob said getting up, "If I ever get the chance, I'm going to beat the tar out that bus driver…Wait, this is the place."

Indeed the streetlight that he slammed into just happened to be the one in front of the Bikini Bottom Video Store.

* * *

Bikini Bottom Video is one of those places that is a paradise for all movie lovers. White walls, red-painted steel pole shelves almost as high as the ceiling. They were all stocked with DVDs. SpongeBob approached the shelf near the right wall. This was his favorite wall when looking for movies. 

"Okay. First order of business: Find Sandy's DVD."

SpongeBob started searching for the E section. On the way, he passed various titles, such as "Night of the Living Goldfish", "Flex in the City: A Documentary of Larry the Lobster", "Day of the Dead Goldfish", "Ocean's Eleven"(He, He), "Planet of the Manatees", and "Dawn of the Goldfish". It was after a few minutes of searching, Sponge found "Enchantment Under the Sea". SpongeBob just decided to jump up and grab it…from the top shelf.

After picking out a few more movies, SpongeBob decided to stop by the "Adult Films" section. (I like to think of SpongeBob as about 20 years old, so in this case, he would be old enough.)

After picking up a copy of "Gills Gone Wild", SpongeBob headed toward the front counter, passing the shelf on the way and realizing how tall it actually was.

After leaving the shop, the little yellow guy decided to step into an alley. It was pretty quite and secluded.

"I must be going crazy! There's nothing wrong with me! I'm A-OK!"

At this last part, SpongeBob put his hand above his head in the (famous) position. When this happened, a thin, sticky stream line shot out of his wrist and stuck to a brick that just happened to be right above him.

When he noticed this, SpongeBob tried to break it off, but as a result, it retracted and pulled him right into the brick.

"Okay, I am officially freaked out now!" he said after finally getting down.

oxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

I can't believe I haven't updated in over a year. I feel terrible.

I'm gonna try to be a little more attentive to these stories of mine.

Please read and review.


End file.
